About Me

I have adopted 4 children from a specific orphanage in Eastern Europe and I want to see more children redeemed from that orphanage and brought into families. I want to make sure that the children who are still left behind in that place are never forgotten.

Tuesday, August 10, 2010

Are they all Yours?

This question really does crack me up. I mean seriously! If someone says to YOU "How many children do you have?" then do you count YOUR KIDS or do you inlude the neighbor kids?

That may sound silly, but if someone asks us how many kids we have and we say "12", then way too often they say "Are they ALL YOURS?".

It happened yesterday to Brent as he was trying to avoid the "dental hygenist" who made me vent last time. She asked the question, he answered the question, and she replied with THAT question. He said "yes". She said something like this "oh great! We have a lady who comes in here who has like 10 kids or something BUT THEY ARE ADOPTED". Now if you can imagine how that went over then I guess you can imagine that I was forced to call the dentist and have them put on our charts that we have to have the other dental hygienist. He didn't say anything to her because at this point we've educated to the extent that it is just not helping. She refuses to see MY KIDS as MINE! Now you could laugh at the fact that she is so deceived into not seeing the "realness" of adoption that she actually never put him into the place of my husband and said that to him, but I just can't quite find any way to laugh over her at all. Thankfully the dentist is a really good man and totally understood as he was apologizing on her behalf and letting me know that we should not have to be offended by her in such ways.

I had just explained the situation to someone today and then headed to Kroger shortly thereafter. Sure enough, someone commented on the amount of milk that I was buying and I said that my kids really like milk. They asked questions and I said that I "have 12 kids". People suddenly have supersonic hearing and another lady says something about "patience". That was followed by the dreaded question again. I really did say it this time. I said it "funny" and in a way to make amusement of the question rather than to be rude. I said "Well, I never do count the neighbor kids in the count, but if you mean did I give birth to them all then no I didn't GIVE BIRTH to 12, but some came to us via the route of adoption, but YES THEY ARE ALL MINE."

She looked satisfied by my answer. I do hope that the way I answered the question made her realize that the question was inappropriate. I just don't get it. I don't walk up to people and wonder if all the kids are theirs. If I did then I sure wouldn't ask such a question. I also am smart enough to realize that if someone says they have "x number of kids" then they have "x number of kids". The route in which the children came doesn't determine if they are theirs! I also don't know of anyone who does count additional children who are not theirs in the count they give of THEIR KIDS!

Good Grief is all their is to say though. Unfortunately their is no pill for "stupid" and no cure for ignorance besides education. I'm determined to try and educate where their is ignorance and walk away from stupid as quickly as possible.


  1. People have no tact! What a silly question to ask after learning you have 12 kids. What could they be thinking?

  2. That question gets me! Oh, I could really light into someone after that one. Still, I have that thing that hates to be rude or make others feel uncomfortable that sometimes stops me. However, I owe it to my family, my kids, and society at large to correct such ignorance.