Some days I just have to revel in the little things. Today I found a hat for Cody that said "Ohio" on the front. Its just a simple ball cap. I am just excited because he talks about coming to "Hio", so I thought it would be something to send him. :)
I'm hoping that Brent can make it to the post office for me tomorrow. This week has been extra busy. We went to get our fingerprints done for the international adoption on Monday and then drove extra to go to the zoo. Brent normally goes to the post office for me on Tuesdays, but I had to go to a different doctor in hopes of getting a doctor to sign off on my medical stuff for our dossier. (Still ticks me off that I can't have our medical provider do it. Anita is the best and who cares if her signature says CNP instead of MD!) Today I had to make a trip to the eye doctor, so Brent came home to sit with the kids. My eyes are so dry that it feels like my eye lids are sticking to my eye balls. (I know YUCK!) I can't figure out if they are worse because of all the antihistamines it takes to survive allergy season or if it is because of all the tears I've cried over our adoption processes and wanting to hold my babies.
Oh, I just remembered that I have stuff to send him from the zoo too. lol I guess the Ohio hat will probably wait until the next time. Maybe I can send it when we have a DATE for him to come to Ohio. :)
Dayton also picked him up something from the AWANA store. Dayton wasn't going to get anything at all until I told him that he could pick out something for Cody. I may wait until next week on it too though. I think he was wanting to write something to send with it.
I need to fall into bed. It would be so much easier to go to bed, if I could go check on all 5 of my children who only live in my heart and not my house right now. I'm sure Cody is fine, though I'm not sure about the 4 in Eastern Europe. Still, it is so much more peaceful when the children are within reach.
Thursday, May 26, 2011
Wednesday, May 25, 2011
Worse than Having 12 Kids in a Tornado Warning
We had a tornado warning here a few weeks ago. We also had a tornado warning to wait through on our way home from the zoo on Monday. They were a little unnerving. The kids always do good, but I hate to think they are even a little scared. I really just don't like tornado warnings.
Tonight I was reminded that there is something worse than keeping 12 kids corralled during a tornado warning.
What is worse is having my little boy so far away and know that he has a tornado warning. So really worse than having to go through a tornado warning WITH 12 kids, is having a tornado warning where my child is WITHOUT me. There was no way to know what the situation was there. There was no way to know when it was officially over. I couldn't look outside to see what the conditions were.
So I did what I could. I stayed glued to the weather channel. I watched it while my heart beat out of my chest. I watched while I prayed that God would keep him safe. Then I prayed for his foster mother who wasn't home and the little one that she is staying in the hospital right now.
When I got done praying about the tornado and storms, I resumed my constant prayer. GOD, PLEASE LET MY LITTLE BOY COME HOME SOON. PLEASE LET ME HOLD HIM. PLEASE LET ME TUCK HIM IN. PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHERE HE IS ALL THE TIME AND WHAT IS GOING ON AROUND HIM. LORD JESUS, PLEASE BRING MY LITTLE GUY HOME INTO MY ARMS.
This part of adoption is like if you gave birth and then they sent the child somewhere else for months. You love the baby, but you don't know when you will get to express that to your child. No one tells you anything about the "end" of waiting. You just hold on knowing that God has a plan.
So if you read this and you don't understand how I feel, just imagine if your child was in the situation and so were you. Quit thinking about the child as if they aren't mine yet. I know that is hard for parents who haven't adopted to understand. It is just the truth. In my heart he is just as mine as the child you gave birth to is your child. You wouldn't love your child less if someone else got to pick their name or if they were in TX right now. You would love them with your whole heart because that is what God made you to do. God made me to love Cody (and the rest of my crew!) and I do love him so very much.
Tonight I was reminded that there is something worse than keeping 12 kids corralled during a tornado warning.
What is worse is having my little boy so far away and know that he has a tornado warning. So really worse than having to go through a tornado warning WITH 12 kids, is having a tornado warning where my child is WITHOUT me. There was no way to know what the situation was there. There was no way to know when it was officially over. I couldn't look outside to see what the conditions were.
So I did what I could. I stayed glued to the weather channel. I watched it while my heart beat out of my chest. I watched while I prayed that God would keep him safe. Then I prayed for his foster mother who wasn't home and the little one that she is staying in the hospital right now.
When I got done praying about the tornado and storms, I resumed my constant prayer. GOD, PLEASE LET MY LITTLE BOY COME HOME SOON. PLEASE LET ME HOLD HIM. PLEASE LET ME TUCK HIM IN. PLEASE LET ME KNOW WHERE HE IS ALL THE TIME AND WHAT IS GOING ON AROUND HIM. LORD JESUS, PLEASE BRING MY LITTLE GUY HOME INTO MY ARMS.
This part of adoption is like if you gave birth and then they sent the child somewhere else for months. You love the baby, but you don't know when you will get to express that to your child. No one tells you anything about the "end" of waiting. You just hold on knowing that God has a plan.
So if you read this and you don't understand how I feel, just imagine if your child was in the situation and so were you. Quit thinking about the child as if they aren't mine yet. I know that is hard for parents who haven't adopted to understand. It is just the truth. In my heart he is just as mine as the child you gave birth to is your child. You wouldn't love your child less if someone else got to pick their name or if they were in TX right now. You would love them with your whole heart because that is what God made you to do. God made me to love Cody (and the rest of my crew!) and I do love him so very much.
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