Andrew was doing so good. Then he decided to choose RAD as his best friend again. His attachments are enough "there" now that he can choose better. It is really just a matter of effort at this point. I mean, it is really a choice when you need to go pee whether to go to the bathroom or to make a hole in your wall and pee in it. I would think it would be an easy choice for most. For Andrew though, it is a toss up!
He had been doing to well. He couldn't stand it with all the fun he was having. How can anyone stand to have priveleges??? The audacity of FUN!
So making a hole in the walls and using it for a toilet he did!
I am not mad really at all. I had hoped he was past that point. I think he did it while we thought he was 'being good'. I think he gets joy from thinking that he snuck something and managed to get by with some plan.
I haven't said anything about it. I don't plan to say anything about it. Brent went in and got it clean. He then put a large piece of plywood over that area to stop it from recurring. I plan to have the rest of the walls covered in plywood as well. I will then paint the walls "pee yellow". I am going to draw "poopy characters" on the walls and give them eyes. I am going to have someone draw a toilet that says "don't forget to flush". I am going to draw circles in case he needs to practice his aim. I am not going to say anything.
If he really thinks that I care if he pees on his walls in his room, then he is wrong. I care that he is making those choices for himself. I need him to realize that I am not affected negatively. I want him to see that my world is still ok. I think I may get some brown playdough and make him some "poopy character" action figures. All the other kids get to have their rooms decorated in whatever they are interested in. We let them play with things that interest them. I will do the same for him.
If you think I am joking when he read this then please continue to think so. If you think I am serious, then you must be raising a child like this or have learned to understand RAD. I personally just know that he always goes back to the bodily functions. In his foster home years ago, he peed from the top bunk into Forrest's ear on the bottom bunk first thing in the morning. This child just won't lose the obsession with trying to affect others with his bodily functions. I am going to let him think that I've joined his obsession and see how fun it is then! hahaha I've had to parent other children before by making them think that I would join their behaviors or find them funny when they were trying to be a pain. This is a step further, but I will go there for him. I mean really "pictures of poop on the walls" or "real poop in the walls" - not a hard choice.
*A special thanks goes out to a great friend who is always there by phone in the "crappy" times, but who can think outside the box with me. LOVE YOU!*