I was thinking today about the WAITING. Here is how adoption goes. They tell you something to do and then as an adoptive parent you - HURRY UP and do it. Then you WAIT. Then you WAIT some more. Then they give you a hoop to jump through and you HURRY UP and JUMP. Then you WAIT and WAIT and WAIT and WAIT. Then you finally see progress. You are matched! They send you an email and you HURRY UP and respond. Then you WAIT and WAIT and WAIT some more.
See when it comes time for me to do something then I HURRY just as fast as I can because I don't want anyone to think it isn't my top priority because it IS. I JUMP just as high as they ask me to JUMP. My agency is pretty awesome to do things speedy quick too I must say which is one of the things that I love about them. In general the system itself is set up for the adoptive parents to JUMP, HURRY, AND WAIT. The system is just making sure to keep things slowly moving at least some of the time and make me WAIT.
I'd love to reform the system. I really would. I would love to find some way to stream line the way that things work. It shouldn't take as long ( or longer) to get a child home from within the US as it does to get one home from another country. Our government systems should be able to fix that. They should be able to fax the info from one agency to the next and it go immediately into the hands of the person who can do something with it. Then they should be able to do what needs done and give the approvals, while keeping it moving. Getting a child home should take weeks or a month at most. It doesn't take that. It takes what seems to be forever. From the time I put in on Julianne the first time until I brought her home was 11 months! Departments switched around and her case was forgotten in the mix. They never even matched her with a family! About 5 or 6 months later they realized and we got matched with her. Then it took another 5 or 6 months to get her home, for a total of 11 months. Those are 11 months that I missed with my little girl! It makes me sick to my stomach.
So I was thinking today about how much time I've spent WAITING. Adoption after adoption leaves me waiting. I wait to get matched. I wait to hear back after a match. I wait to get info. I wait to get details of how to bring them home. I wait through ICPC. I WAIT. Then I wait more. Once they get home I WAIT more. See then there is the waiting for social workers to call. Waiting on workers in other states to get the paperwork together. Waiting for finalizations!
I really do think that I have been WAITING for more time than Michelle Duggar has been pregnant. I don't know for sure because I have twelve kids and I don't have time to do the math. I did WAIT through one biological pregnancy. You would need to add in all the time that I waited before that for a match and to bring home each child. Then add in the time that I WAIT for finalization. I think I would come out on top of the waiting category.
Right now I am waiting. I am waiting for a case file to read so that I can see a picture of my little boy. I am waiting for "P"s caseworker and whoever else is involved to decide if we could have the blessing of being her forever family. I am waiting for news of how long this is going to take. I AM WAITING. The blessings are worth it, but the waiting could drive anyone nuts.
Pray that the WAITS aren't that long.